


My Voice (can you hear it?)

by b0o



Category: Gorillaz
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bottom Stuart "2D" Pots, Drunk Murdoc Niccals, Family Dynamics, M/M, Mpreg, Phase One (Gorillaz), Phase Two (Gorillaz)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-28
Updated: 2019-08-28
Packaged: 2020-09-28 09:17:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,674
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20423564
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/b0o/pseuds/b0o
Summary: Murdoc was good at drowning away his feelings and putting on a tough mask, he punched first cause it hurt less when they hit back. He carefully avoided gooey emotions like the plague it was, but when he's alone all he can think of is 2D. It would be a simple no strings attached deal, but when have those ever really worked out?





	My Voice (can you hear it?)

**Author's Note:**

> I won't apologize.

Murdoc was good at shoving down his anxiety and fear to a dark corner of his mind, store it away so he could function daily. It was a necessary survival tactic that was needed to survive his father and brother. 

After he got out of the hellhole he called a childhood home and got older he learned how to shove away unwanted memories, and that it was easier to throw the punch instead of recieve it. When the self doubt began to surface and the voice in his head sounded more like his father than himself. 

Then it was all just drowned away with alcohol, drugs, and meaningless sex. Murdoc had created a system that kept him from coming undone at the seams, it had worked for years but a certain monkey wrench changed it all. 

When 2D had stood up and turned to face him, Murdoc felt a deep instinct to keep the lanky omega close to him. When he learned the man could sing and play the piano, a plan formed quickly and the moment he thought of it he ran with it. 

Soon enough Gorillaz was formed, Paula was gotten rid of and Murdoc felt the broken nose was worth it to watch her leave. Noodle showed up into their lives and somehow it felt natural that the girl was with them, that this was the way the band was supposed to be. 

They worked well together as musicians and while fighting was normal, Murdoc could actually stand their presence better than he could most people. Yet Murdoc felt something different when it came to 2D, when the tall omega looked at him with those dark eyes it felt like his very soul was being evaluated. 

When he gave the alpha a gapped tooth smile, it looked as if he was telling him everything was going to be alright. The offhand comments that showed 2D cared about him, or how 2D stayed near him even when he should have run. It made some suppressed place in Murdoc’s heart thrum with hope, and in true Murdoc fashion he beat that part away. 

He yelled and threw things at 2D, smiled as he clutched his hands to his chest and skittered away. At night when his mind replayed the fear in the singers eyes and the voice whispered that he had become his father, it was chased away by cheap vodka. 

When the band went their separate ways to take ‘personal time’, Murdoc felt a hole in his chest that couldn’t be drowned out by whores and booze. One night while so out of it he could barely see Murdoc wanted to hear that high pitch voice so badly it ached. 

In his fogged brain the plan was airtight, call Stu knowing he would be asleep and listen to the voicemail to get his fill. He hadn’t factored in that 2D had an even more screwed up sleep cycle than Murdoc and on the second ring that high voice spoke, “Mudz? Yew alright?” 

The relief he felt at hearing 2D saying his name mixed with the substances in his blood to give him a boneless calm, “jus’ need’d ta hear yer voice.” 

The other line went silent for a moment before 2D spoke again, talking aimlessly about his day and different song ideas. The familiar voice had the numb feeling creeping over Murdoc and soon enough he was out. 

Things got more complicated after that, he ignored the whole event and blew off the steady increase of calls from the man. Until it got to the point that he picked up just to tell the man to fuck off, when he heard the pure relief in the mans voice his threat was cut off. 

Somehow or another 2D convinced Murdoc that they should meet, and Murdoc begrudgingly agreed on the condition that 2D better have a good song to show him. He had gotten properly buzzed before it was time to meet the man and had been more than ready to start throwing things if 2D tried to talk about feelings. 

Instead when 2D showed up in front of his hotel room the taller man immediately went for a kiss, he had drawn back quickly but Murdoc had a taste now. Their reunion had been sweaty and loud, every fantasy Murdoc had involving this moment were proven poor imitations of the real thing. 

Hours later when they were spent 2D decided to try to talk about what had happened, Murdoc shut him up by saying this would just be physical. Lines were drawn in the following weeks and despite the fact that Murdoc constantly reaffirmed that this was just about sex. 

The alpha still felt something deep in his stomach flip when he woke up to the scent of butterscotch and long arms around him. When 2D’s heat approached and he quietly asked if Murdoc would help him through it, the alpha agreed with a shrug. 

During it however he did his best to make it as smooth as possible, making sure the omega ate and stayed hydrated. During the peak 2D had moaned out words of love and adoration, it was only when he was asleep that Murdoc whispered similar words into the air. 

Three heats were shared before Noodle sent out a message to the other members and they converged back to Kong Studios. It looked different and Noodle, who had grown up a little since Murdoc last saw the girl and would probably present sometime soon, mentioned something about clearing it out. 

Murdoc and Russel still clashed, as was to be expected with two strong willed alphas under one roof, but it wasn’t as bloody as it had been before. 2D and Murdoc kept their new relationship a secret, though Noodle would sometimes look between the two before smiling at them. 

Russel found out when Murdoc had slinked out of 2D’s room early one morning and the other alpha had been passing by, Murdoc had been thrown against the wall before he could even notice the man. Russel kept his arm firmly over his chest and gave Murdoc a firm warning. 

“I’ma make this real simple for ya, if I even think this is anything less than consensual at any point. There won’t be a demon in existence that could save your ass.” 

Murdoc bared his teeth at the implication, he was an irredeemable asshole yes but that was a different level. “Trust me mate, he’s more than happy with what I do to him.” 

Russel stared at him for a moment longer before letting him go, “jus’ keep it that way. Oh and don’t go hittin’ him like you did before neither, don’t care what you two have goin’ on but you don’t slap around the person you sleep with.” 

Murdoc grit his teeth and wanted to scream back that he could do whatever the hell he pleased, but the man was already down the hall and it seemed like a waste of breath. Russel seemed to look at 2D a lot more after that, seeming to check for any bruises or marks other than the hickeys that Murdoc dutifully left to be seen. 

2D’s heat hit a month after the band got together again and Murdoc let himself drink in the sights and smells, let himself indulge the way 2D grabbed his hand and spewed out how much he loved the alpha. 

Weeks had passed after the heat ended and 2D slowly began to pull away, it was hard to notice at first but after two weeks of the new coldness Murdoc had enough. He then got pissed and proceeded to drink which led to him yelling at the omega for being so weird, his rant was cut off when he stepped closer to the man and a look of pure terror washed over 2D’s face. 

The fear had Murdoc freezing before he spun on his heel and stomped back to his Winnie, where he proceeded to drown out all of the memories of everything he’d done to the omega with burning alcohol. 

Nightmares were hardly rare for Murdoc, but this one felt different from the ones centered around his father. It felt too real and when Murdoc woke up he felt the sharp despair still deep in his heart, he hadn’t bothered to pull on clothes and had instead began searching the studio for 2D. 

When he entered the kitchen he saw the omega sipping tea and looking out the window with a pained look, it was still too early to be called morning and for the other members to be up. He marched towards the omega who was now looking at him with wide eyes, bending down he buried his crooked nose in the crook of 2Ds neck and breathed deeply. 

Murdoc ignored the way the man went completely still and breathed in again, the butterscotch scent was prevalent but just slightly different. Just a bit sweeter in a way that was different from his scent during heat, he pulled away with his hands still on 2Ds shoulders. 

“So you’re pregnant.” 

The shoulders under his hands began to tremble and 2D stared with wide eyes, “I-I didn’t. I’ll leave, go to me parents.” 

Murdoc felt a flash of dread at that, “don’t be stupid. We’ll fix this place up right for a tyke. Besides if you think I’ll just let our kid be raised by two stiffs you got another thing comin’.” 

Stu blinked and seemed to gather his thoughts with a slack jaw, “yer not mad?” No Murdoc was not mad at him, if he was forced to identify the emotion he felt it would be closer to fear.

“Nah, kid’ll probably come out playin’ the flute. ‘Sides, it’s a mix of us and it’ll be interesting to see how that plays out.” 2D shakily rose to his feet and wrapped his arms around the alpha, he was still trembling and Murdoc found his arms moving on their own accord to embrace the younger man.

**Author's Note:**

> Validate me please. This went through three completly different rewrites and I'm still side eyeing it.


End file.
